Friday, March 19, 2010

The Gilded Age


Let's be real here... did anyone have a good time in history class when we read about William Jennings Bryan and his Silver Standard arguments? Did anyone remember the difference between Cleveland, Garfield and some other president named after a cartoon cat? Does anyone think that this was interesting in any way whatsoever?

Nope.

CLEAR HISTORY OPTION PLEASE! INCLUDING ALL OFFLINE DATA AND COOKIES! DON'T NEED ANY OF IT!

My High School Love Life


Oh wait! It must have already been cleared! I can't remember ANYTHING! HAHAHAHA!

um....

I was wearing a cape for some reason. That might explain it.

My Pokemon Game Playing Years

Some knowledge makes you a more well rounded individual. Some knowledge helps you realize mistakes that you might make in the future. But some knowledge just makes you look like a complete nerd when you effortlessly make a reference to it in front of a girl that you have a crush on.

Pokemon falls into that last category. And neither of the other two. I can't see a situation where I will be a more well rounded individual through my knowledge of Squirtle attacks, and this knowledge will actually cause me to make mistakes in the future rather than avoid them (apparently shooting water at a rock is not "Super Effective," more it is just useless). As much as the 150 pocket monsters like to run around in my brain like Team Rocket likes to hide in caves and such, I think I could do without this knowledge.

Let's clear that cache. Before I tell my date that the wine we're drinking was "Super Effective" against my alcohol tolerance. Again.

My defecation history from birth to age 3

One of my father's favorite stories to tell friends and family involves me pooping as a 8 month old on the way back from a dinner that we attended with my grandparents. I guess it was so awful that 25 years later it still is a favorite story to tell amongst the members of my family reunion. I GUESS OTHER BABIES NEVER SMELLED, GUYS!

Boy it would be fun to clear that history, right? Yep. That's a history that I could easily get rid of.

I have other stories quite similar to these when I was older, but those are more funny since they're just kinda pathetic... so I'll keep those.